We were all warmly touched when Dr. Fauci took time out of his busy schedule being the world's only fact-checked verified authority on everything medical and inoculated Santa Claus with the Covid-19 vaccine. The problem is, children, his action is now causing a super-spreader event of catastrophic proportions. By now, everyone in the world has handled presents received from the North Pole. And as we've been warned, Covid-19 can live on various surfaces for days, including packages handled in busy workshops. Unfortunately, Dr. Fauci neglected to include Santa's elves in his inoculation plans. Neither did he make certain that the elves and Santa adhered to proper social distancing and mask wearing protocols during the present-making process. An added concern is the rumor that Covid-19 passed back-and-forth between reindeer and elves, during which time it mutated into a new, ho-ho-horrific form. Heaven help us all.
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